Why Is Change So Hard—and How Do I Make It Easier?

Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino
Jun 17
3 min read

By Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino

Change. It’s the one constant in life—and still, it’s the thing we resist the most.

Whether it’s starting over, letting go, saying yes to something new, or simply adjusting to life’s unexpected curveballs, change has a way of shaking us. Even when it’s for the better, change stirs fear, uncertainty, and discomfort.

That’s why one of the most common questions I hear is:“Why is change so hard?”

If you’ve asked yourself this recently, you’re not alone. In fact, you’re human.

Why We Struggle With Change

Change challenges identity. It interrupts routine. It exposes areas where we’ve grown too comfortable—or where we’ve outgrown who we used to be. It can make us feel ungrounded, unsure, and sometimes even like we’re starting from scratch.

But here’s the truth I’ve come to understand after coaching thousands of people and writing The Change Guidebook:

Change isn’t just about what’s happening around you. It’s about what’s awakening within you.

We often fear change not because of the change itself—but because of what it demands of us:

Letting go of control
Releasing outdated beliefs
Taking responsibility for our choices
Trusting the unknown

That’s vulnerable work. But it’s also where growth lives.

The Truth About Meaningful Change

When people say, “I want my life to be different,” what they often mean is, “I want things to improve, but I don’t want to feel uncomfortable getting there.”

Unfortunately, that’s not how it works.

Change asks us to participate. It requires presence, intention, and yes—courage. But here’s the good news: You’re more capable than you realize. And you don’t have to do it alone.

In The Change Guidebook, I walk you through the 10 Points of Change that help you move from fear to empowerment. These aren’t just concepts—they’re actionable tools to help you align your heart, truths, and energy in every area of your life.

A few examples:

Imagine what’s possible instead of obsessing over what’s gone.
Believe in your ability to adapt, even if you don’t feel “ready.”
Plan with purpose instead of reacting in panic.
Adjust when the path shifts. And then—Celebrate even the smallest steps forward.

When we work with change instead of fighting it, we start to see it for what it is: a call to rise, not retreat.

A Real-Life Reminder

Recently, I spoke with someone who was grieving the loss of a career they had for over a decade. They told me, “I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore.” I gently asked them: “Who might you be becoming?”

That shift in perspective—away from loss and toward possibility—is the bridge from fear to faith. That’s the kind of change we’re here to guide.

Because it’s not about going back. It’s about going deeper.

Ask Yourself This

If you’re facing change right now, ask yourself:

What am I afraid of losing—and what might I gain instead?
What’s the smallest next step I can take that feels aligned?
Who am I becoming through this?

These questions don’t require perfect answers. They simply invite you into the process. Into self-leadership. Into courage.

Change may feel hard—but it’s also where your next chapter begins. You’re not meant to stay stagnant. You’re here to evolve, expand, and become. And you don’t have to do it perfectly—you just have to do it honestly.

If you’re ready to create lasting change, I invite you to explore The Change Guidebook—a trusted companion for navigating transition with clarity, confidence, and purpose.

You are capable of more than you think. Let change become your invitation, not your obstacle.