Ask Elizabeth: How Do I Stop Feeling Like I’m Falling Behind in Life?

Dear Elizabeth,

I’m in my late 40s, and I can’t shake the feeling that I’m behind everyone else. My friends are retiring early, buying second homes, or celebrating career milestones I haven’t reached. I have so many dreams, but I feel like I missed my chance. How do I stop comparing and start believing in myself again?– Falling Behind

Dear Falling Behind,

First, I want to say this: You are not behind. You are becoming.

The idea that we all must hit life’s milestones on a fixed timeline is one of the biggest peace disruptors out there. Our culture pushes a linear definition of success—graduate, marry, climb the ladder, retire—but life is rarely that neat. Life is layered, circular, and deeply personal. You haven’t missed your moment. You’re in it.

When I wrote The Change Guidebook, I emphasized this truth: Change is always possible when you're aligned with your heart, truths, and energy. That alignment doesn't follow a clock. It follows courage. And every time you pause to reflect on your next best step, you are exercising that courage.

Let me offer three steps to reframe your perspective and reclaim your peace:

1️⃣ Reconnect with Your Own Timeline

Stop measuring your life against someone else’s highlight reel. Your soul didn’t come here to follow their map—it came to chart yours. Pull out a journal and finish this prompt:

“I still want to become the person who…”Your dreams are not expired. They are evolving.

2️⃣ Flip the Script with Gratitude

Try this Gratitude Flip™—instead of saying, “I should have more by now,” shift it to:

“I’m grateful for what I’ve built—and excited for what’s still possible.”This small shift from pressure to possibility can free your energy and restore momentum.

3️⃣ Celebrate Your Becoming

In The Success Guidebook, I encourage readers to Celebrate the Now—because success isn’t just what’s next. It’s also how we show up now, with presence and intention. You’ve weathered storms. You’ve learned, adapted, and grown. That is success. Celebrate your resilience.

You’re not falling behind. You’re on a deeply meaningful path that is still unfolding. And here’s the good news: You are the author of what comes next.

Let this be the season you redefine success, reclaim your energy, and rise—not in comparison to others, but in alignment with your best ever you.

With gratitude and belief in you,

Elizabeth

About Elizabeth:

Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino is a bestselling author, master life coach, and founder of The Best Ever You Network. With a passion for helping people navigate change and cultivate peace, she’s known for blending heart, humor, and real-life wisdom. As the author of The Change Guidebook, The Success Guidebook, and co-author of The Peace Guidebook, Elizabeth is dedicated to helping others live authentically, lead with compassion, and rise with purpose. She lives between Maine and South Carolina with her husband, Peter, and is the proud mom of four grown sons.